Why Not Me?
I sat at a different desk at work today whilst my pc was getting repaired, well getting the guts ripped out and new entrails being inserted. Hopefully they’ve sorted out the noisy fan and extreme heat event that happened every afternoon at the back of the case.I was on one side of the “inner-prong” of the three prongs of desks which constitue our department. The other prongs including my normal position look out onto other infinitely less stressed departments. The rule is the closer to the wall you are, the more important you are- so told because the wall desks get 90-degree returns allowing more storage space. So I sat with a different vista today looking at what might have been. Someone the same age as me, technically an extra year’s experience but the same age and he is one of the department managers and several grades higher. A conservative estimate would indicate that it will take me at least another five years to reach where he did a year ago. That sucks. Does it come down to talent? Experience? Or is it just luck? On the other hand I might never achieve the same level of management. Depressing.
How much does being in the right place at the right time count? If it is a young progressive company why does everything seem so traditional? Why are people the same age doing better than me and people younger than me doing just as well? I figure I’m underachieving. Badly.
You do the work you’re given, take on board all the learning and advice and yet it doesn’t seem to be what you need to succeed anyway. When did I stop being valued and start being used?
All in all it makes for quite a depressing birthday, but then all the weekday ones in adulthood are. Just racking up the numbers to cofnrim my underachievement.
Last modified: Thursday, April 9th, 2026 at 9:24am
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